Goals for the Year

I don't usually do New Years Resolutions--in the past, I've written New Years Manifestos of the things that I planned to accomplish in the upcoming year. It's my way of visualizing success--a sort of vision board in list form. But this year, I am not really looking to conquer anything. I really more just want to be, and be the best I can be. So as it turns out, I have a list of resolutions. Some are harder than others, but I will try my best to work on the following:

1) To be more mindful and calm. I spend a good deal of my life stressed out. I'm in charge of many of my projects--either as director or producer or both or choreographer or whatever. On top of that, with mom's multitide of ailments, I always need to keep on top of her and her care. And that is tough, too. So I am trying to maintain a level of peace. I think pulling back on my projects will help this. I can control these things. I am going to try to stay on top of the things I have control of, so that I can better handle the things I cannot.

2) To lean more on others. I think I am going to try to set up an assistant director for some things. And this is ok. After the almost 11 years of parental illnesses, I always feel like I need an out of my work and projects. I hate feeling beholden to anything. I want my time to be my own. And the thing is, I am not so amazing that I am the only person who can do the things that I do. So it's ok to step back a bit and let others do their thing, too. Teamwork is Dreamwork, yo.

3) To keep the house maintained. Fuzzy and I are terrible at this. When we are never home, we exist out of tote bags and water bottles and things come in the house, get set somewhere and stacked upon and then it stays there for years. Case in point--I was just cleaning off the coffee table, and found programs from last February and candy from Halloween 2013. This isn't right. When we do laundry, often I let it pile up instead of putting it away. This clutter just adds stress, and it is always easier to tackle small projects than massive ones. So I've spent a good deal of the last week just cleaning, purging and organizing. Staying on top of the dishes and laundry. Dealing with the mail right away. It feels good and gives me a sense of calm. This will be my most challenging goal for the year.

4) To drink a glass of water every morning when I get up. This one is super attainable and seems less important, but I think it will make a big difference. I've had chronic morning sickness since I was a child. Eating is difficult for me in the morning.  I used to throw up every morning (which we later discovered was due to lactose intolerance) and as an adult, I dry heave a lot (and sometimes, yes, throw up) in the morning. I think it is mostly stress, but it is also due to the fact that I can barely eat, but yet I have to have coffee. Therefore, most days, the first thing I put in my system is a lot of espresso, and that acid and content can't be good for nausea. If I drink a glass of water before coffee, it will not only help hydrate me, but it will put a good base in my stomach. Plus, more water is always good (note: I am a good water drinker anyways--with hyperhidrosis and kidney stones, I have to pound more water than most people.) So far so good on this one.

5) To be less accessible. I am not on Facebook, and I am barely on Twitter (I've lately just been tweeting, but not reading), but with the projects and mom, etc, I feel like I am always on call. With smart phones, we've trained ourselves to need an instant response, and if we don't get it, we are inconvenienced or people assume something is wrong. I am trying to step away from that and put some more distance there. Between emails, texts, and calls, I feel like my time is always belonging to others. Don't get me wrong--I LOVE my friends and family, and I LOVE the communication I have with them, but it can sometimes be overwhelming. Some emails don't need an immediate response. Sometimes it's ok to leave your phone on Do Not Disturb.

6) Quality Quality Quality. Quality people, quality projects, quality food, quality experiences, quality quality.

So there you have it. I want to be the best Erica I can be. For myself, and subsequently to everything and everyone else in my life. 2015 is going to be a big one--lots of happenings for Team Gerdes, and with these goals, I will be ready for them.