Oh, I Get It!


Wow, huh? December 10th already?

As you probably read earlier (or not--Hi new readers!), I have been dreading the Christmas season and holidays in general and wishing they would just come and go without a peep. Longing for a change and a way out, Fuzzy and I made the following decisions:

We are not giving or accepting presents.
We are not traveling this holiday season.

And wouldn't you know it--what a difference it makes!
I have never spent a Christmas in Chicago--they have either been in Mississippi or Texas. I love my family and Fuzzy's family, but this year, my mom is going to visit my brother's in-laws in NJ, so she is taken care of, and we visited with Fuzzy's family earlier this year, so we decided to go visit next year when the babies will be a little older. It is really relaxing knowing that we aren't going anywhere--we can accept invitations to parties-cause we are here! We can relax cause we aren't spending what little money we have on plane fare. We can actually have a few days off instead of going somewhere and always having to be 'on.'

And with the presents--I love shopping for people, but this year, with the job market being as screwy as it is, it is nice to not be a part of it. We will be giving to charities in people's honor--cause they need it more. We told the family that instead of shopping for us, send the money you would normally spend and send it either to their credit cards or to charity. We are adults--we have everything we need, and if not, we buy it. The last thing we need is people to buy us stuff that we don't need just cause they think they have to--I would just feel selfish.

So in the meantime, I think I am enjoying the season! I am a little shy to go to church, cause I know I would just sob the whole time, but I might go in the coming weeks. Last night we put up our tree, and when we turned out the lights to look at it, I was overwhelmed with emotion and memories and the sincerity of it all. It was so sweet. It is a little mindboggling to think of the changes that have occured in the last year and how much our family has changed. And it was a relief to think that Fuzzy and I are our own little family (with the kitties) now and it is a positive step to start our own family traditions. A new beginning.

The other morning, when it was the massive snowfall, Fuzzy and I started singing "Let it Snow" and for the first time in my life, I actually GOT IT. I understood the words and the meaning. It didn't matter what was happening out in the rest of the world, I had everything I needed inside.

I think it will be a lovely last Christmas for this decade in my life.
Now where is my hot chocolate and Bailey's?


You're probably the most genuine person I know. and that's all i have to say about that.

Oh wow. Thank you!

I've done this myself in the past... sometimes the best gift you can give yourself for Christmas is time alone. Holidays can put some real pressure on folks, and while they're SUPPOSED to be happy, a lot of times they aren't.

I'll be around for Christmas myself... maybe we can find a bar that's open and have a nice cocktail!

Keep on keepin' on, Erica! Things are only getting better!

Your holiday sounds perfect, lovie. And as for the church thing...a few years ago I was having a really rought time - I knew I needed to go to church, but I didn't have a good one to go to. So I just went. I cried for the first 4 or 5 weeks in a row...I sat in the back, and left right before it ended so I wouldn't have to, you know, like touch anyone, or have them smile at me...
But finally I stayed. And that day, the preacher hugged me when I was leaving, and I was home. I still cried every week...