Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me

Here it is, the day of the Soiree DADA opening, and it is past midnight and I can't sleep. Tonight Fuzzy and I treated ourselves to delicious delivery sushi, wine, and Top Chef, then were so tired we went to bed pretty early. And I woke up an hour later and have been figity and anxious ever since. Can't shut the brain off. This happens when I am stressed out--I can't sleep when I need it most and when I do, it is all nightmares and anxiety dreams. Tomorrow (or later today) I am treating myself to sleeping in, a nice breakfast, a half hour massage to make sure I don't have any more muscle spasms during the show, then therapy and chill time to decompress before calltime. I have a lot of friends coming to the show, so their support will be incredible, especially on our vulnerable first night.

Do you ever think about what people's skeletons look like when they are going about their day to day life? You should try it--it is creepy. Like, right now, my skeleton is kind of balled up in my computer chair. Think about my creepy skeleton fingers typing this right now! EEK!

I am happy to report that the Neutrino Project is now officially closed. It was a fun run and a great experiment, and the biggest shocker of all--we made rent! Thank you so much to all to came to see it and for those who worked on the show. What a trip.

It is refreshing to just have the one show running now, instead of 4. Though this one is like ten times the work of those 4 combined.

A very happy congratulations to all my beloved friends who have recently had babies and for the ones that are on the way!!! Andrea, Abby, Laura (Raunch), Ashley, Sarah and Sara--I am thinking of you all! I know there are more, but that is all my crazy fried brain can pull up right now.

I was thinking today about my college friend Becky who was murdered 4 years ago on my birthday and looking at pics of her online and reading articles about the crime. For some reason, she has been on my mind a lot. I need to track down her parents again and send them a card to let them know I am thinking about them. Becky was an amazing person and was going places in the DJ and broadcasting world. The world is a duller place without her in it. Makes me all the more thankful for being alive and for what I have. For all the wah wahing (i know, it is called the healing process) that I have been doing lately, the truth of the matter is, I have an incredible life. I have the most amazing and wonderful husband who every day surpasses my wildest dreams and whom I love more and more everyday, I have an incredible supportive family, I am able to create art and follow my passion (and the one thing I have ever been any good at), I have amazing friends that I love and that make me laugh every day, I live in an amazing city and now an amazing country with a soon to be amazing president. I am alive. What a blessing each day really and truly is.

Maybe I should try this sleep thing again. Or maybe I should prep my suitcase for the show tomorrow and pin my pocket back on my pants. Or maybe I should hold my fatty Parker. Sounds like a win, win, win, right?

Wherever you go, there's your butt. Or your creepy walking skeleton.